Earlier today I joined my darling wife out in the backyard. "Oh Boy," she said excitedly, "you're coming to help with the gardening?"
"No," says I, "I was planning on re-playing The Battle Of Farm Scenario from Rogue Trader with vintage Star Wars action figures!"
"Oh."
And she smiled.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
On a doubly sunny day on Tatooine, a young farm-boy decides it is time to leave his run-down farm and journey out into the galaxy in search of adventure.
"Nothing ever happens around here," he whines as he zooms off on his cool land-speeder.
It was a good thing too, because in a matter of minutes a group of tired Imperial Marines enters the farmyard.
"Let us rest a bit in this farmhouse," rasps Marine Commander Lord Pedro Vader.
"Sir?," requests Brother Marine Hoth, "May I have the honour of the first watch?"
"Yes," says Brother Boba, "Me too."
"And me too," adds Sister Leia.
"No, dear comrades," says Lord Pedro, "you have done enough for today. Go get some rest and let me call a couple of Stormtroopers for Sentry duty."
As soon as everyone is tucked in, a sentry raises the alarm!
"ORKS!!!" he screams, "AND THEY'RE BEING LED BY JABBA THE THRUGG!!!"
"GET UP EVERYBODY!!!"
The Ork attack begins as one massive charge.
Casualities are heavy, but so is their leader.
Lord Pedro hops up on the farmyard wall and orders Brother Boba to fire his missile.
(The obligatory blast shot.)
The blast is horrible!
But this only renews the Orken determination!
Plus, a surprise random appearance of some Tusken Raiders helps in the attack....
Meanwhile, Lord Pedro and Jabba The Thrugg battle it out. They are each down to one wound...
...when the rains come! And it rains (as everyone knows) very hard on Tatooine!
Lucky a Hero arrives...
...and whisks a happily dazed Sister Leia away.
No one else is left standing.
P.S. - Thanks to Zhu for this!
